AEW Dynamite Results – 3/18/20
AEW Dynamite Results – 3/18/20
Commentary Team: Jim Ross, Taz & Excalibur
Cody talks about how small recent events have made us all feel and how important what they do is, and he’s about to ask three of the best athletes in the world to discard their petty differences and stand together. We, as human beings, need to stand together, but for many of us that means standing at a distance. We have to be informed and held responsible by health and science, but we cannot live in fear.
He doesn’t know about us but he feels alive and he hopes we feel alive. (I certainly feel alive, the way progesterone’s given me growing pains today!) He calls Matt Jackson out and says nothing is owed to him and his anger is misplaced. Cody needs his wisdom as an older brother to carry Nick Jackson’s heart into this match.
Speaking of Adam Page, he gets tired of putting him over but he’s a scary combination of light heavyweight skill and accuracy combined with heavyweight stopping power, and he thought he was going to be the first AEW World Champion. He needs to get over the loss, and he needs to be the differencemaker, the reason the Elite win at Blood and Guts.
And then there’s his most unique friendship in pro wrestling, Kenny Omega. They don’t always like each other, they can argue about who’s best all day and he respects that neither of them want to be bridesmaids but this isn’t a wedding. He needs Kenny, and he needs the *real* Kenny Omega, the Best Bout Machine.
In short, he needs the Elite to be Elite.
Matt and Kenny come to ringside and join him.
Omega gets on the mic and says normally you’d be speaking in front of a whole arena, but here they are, friends talking to friends. The whole world’s falling apart, and who knows if there even will be a Dynamite next week, but he wants to go out the same way he came in, as the Elite.
Matt grabs the mic and says they said it well but look, it’s just the three of them here. Nick is out indefinately and wasn’t even allowed on an airplane. And where is Hangman?
Enter Adam Page, wearing a Dixie Chicks t-shirt and a denim jacket, nursing a whiskey as promised. Jackson says they’re not gonna fix this tonight, but he’s asking him, man to man, will he stand with them?
Page offers something of a toast and leaves.
Kenny speaks directly to us and says it’s hard to feel our energy, but they know we’re out there and all they can do is give us their best. The world goes on, we need entertainment and positivity, so goddamnit, hit the lights and hit the pyro and start Dynamite!
We indeed get lights and pyro as the Elite lads high five with their forearms.
MJF is interviewed by Tony Schiavone.
He says he’s not wrestling tonight. He saw the winner’s purse on the line, and that might be a lot of money for some people, but not him, so he’s gonna let the undercard people get their TV time.
He passes some money to Shawn Spears and Tony asks if they’re gambling, which leads MJF to flip out on him and scream in his face denying any such notion. MJF, Spears, Jake Roberts, Lance Archer, Joey Janela and others are setting in the crowd to make some noise in place of an audience
Justin Roberts couldn’t make it so Brandi is reprising her role from WWE (then she was known as Eden Stiles)
THE BEST FRIENDS VS THE LUCHA BROS:
Chuck with a Back Suplex on Fenix for a 2 count, Friends with a Double Suplex for a 2 count, Dropkick for a 2 count, Bros with the Double Whammy on Trent?, Pentagon into a cover for a 2 count, Pentagon with a Superkick for a 2 count, Pentagon Driver blocked, Trent? with a Dudebuster DDT, Friends with a Law Dart into an Ace Crusher, they think about he hug instead go for the Forearm Bump, Orange with a Twisting Senton off the stage onto Bros, back in the ring, Chuck with Stump Piledriver for a near fall, Strong Zero blocked, Fenix with a nut punt to Trent? behind the ref’s back then they finish him with Zero Fear for the win
WINNERS: THE LUCHA BROS
MJF gets in Spears’ face like a drinky bird, having apparently won their bet.
Post-match, Tony Schiavone interviews Best Friends.
Chuck calls Death Triangle a bunch of chumps, saying they wanted to kick Trent? in the dick behind the ref’s back, they don’t need a ref and challenges them to a no-ring street fight! Trent? suggests that they actually fight in the parking lot and it’s officially a challenge!
PENELOPE FORD W/KIP SABIAN VS RIHO VS KRIS STATLANDER VS HIKARU SHIDA:
Kris puts Riho in the middle ropes then Shida Suplexes her into Riho, cover for a 2 count, Shida with a Small Package on Kris for a 2 count, Riho with a Diving Hurricanrana, Shida follows with a Missle Dropkick on Kris, Riho with a Baseball Slide takes down Kip, Jumping Knee off Ford’s back drops Kip, Kris wit a Standing Gourdbuster on Shida, Electric chair Splash on Riho, Ford with a Poisoned Frankensteiner on Kris, Falcon Arrow on Ford, but only gets a near fall, she finishes Ford with the Tamashii no Three Count for the win
WINNER: HIKARU SHIDA
Colt Cabana is interviewed by Tony Schiavone.
He says this is pretty weird but he’s doing some scouting and calls himself the Bruce Springsteen of AEW before offering some critique of Penelope Ford relying on Kip Sabian. Sabian rolls up to go back and forth with him and Colt slaps him in the face and sends him running
Parking lot interview with Jon Moxley where we find out he’s on a do not enter list.
He asks what medically cleared even is and says they don’t need him punching out any cops, so he’s gonna take a drive and blow off some steam, but the Inner Circle need to know he’ll always be in their blind spot and he’s not gonna miss Blood and Guts for the world. He gets in the Ford GT and drives off.
THE BUTCHER & THE BLADE VS JURASSIC EXPRESS:
Boy with a flash pin on Blade for a 2 count, Express with an Assisted Complete Shot for a 1 count, Boy with an Imploding Senton, Slingshot Crossbody but they catch him and toss Boy into the barricade, pair of Double Snake Eyes on the apron, Blade with a Lariat for a 2 count, Sidewalk Slam/Legdrop combo for a 2 count, Blade with a Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker for a 2 count, Saurus with a Moonsault off the apron onto Butcher, Tornado Kick to Blade, Land Before Time connects, but Butcher makes the save, Boy takes out Blade, Saurus with a Superkick, goozle, but Blade breaks it up, B & B with an Assisted Sambo Suplex, MJF tells them to finish it and calls for Full Death, but Saurus breaks it up with a Headbutt, Tail Whip sends Butcher to the floor, Extinction/Ace Crusher combo on Blade, Boy keeps Butcher at bay while Saurus pins Blade for the win
WINNERS: JURASSIC EXPRESS
Evil Uno and Stu Grayson make their entrance, so it’s time for the Exalted One!
Uno asks for the production team to focus on his eyes and talks about how the Exalted One is going to breathe new life into the Dark Order. He has promised the arrival of the Exalted One, and Evil Uno never lies or breaks his promises, because Evil Uno cares about you. Together, we are one, and the Exalted One is near! The Exalted One is…
Christopher Daniels rolls up and tells him to stop running his mouth. It’s been three months straight and Evil Uno has told lies every chance he gets. He’s sick of it— he talks about making lives better, but he hasn’t made Alex Reynolds or John Silver any better, all he’s done is wasted our time and we’re sick of it!
The biggest lie that he’s told is that there is an Exalted One, because he doesn’t exist and it’s just the two of them.
Strange throbbing music fills the arena and a distorted voice comes over the speakers, introducing himself as the Exalted One. The new rule of the Dark Order goes like this, they do what they want when they want, and if they want something, they take it. You open the door and you let the Dark Order in, and if you don’t, he personally will kick the door down and let you in.
IT’S BIG, BAD, BRODIE LEE!
You thought you were safe, Daniels? Well the word is out, because you’re very unsafe. All the jokes and games and he’s brought it on himself. He’s not the first out of touch old man to not believe in him, but he’ll be the last. He formally introduces himself as Brodie Lee… AND HE’S IN THE RING RIGHT NOW! BIG BOOT FROM THE BIG RIG AND HE FOLLOWS IT UP BY DROPPING THE FALLEN ANGEL WITH A SISTER ABIGAIL CLUTCH THEN SPINS HIM INTO THE ROLLING LARIAT!
Lance Archer is interviewed, accompanied by Jake “the Snake” Roberts as usual.
Jake commandeers the mic and tells Cody Rhodes that they laid the gauntlet at his feet and gave him respect, but what did they get in return? Absolutely nothing! He’s got a record, they don’t play games, they told him what they want, and it’s one thing to keep away and try to keep out of harm’s way, he understands that, but ignoring them is like spitting on his face and he will not have that.
He listened to him and his friends bitching like girls worried about prom, and if he doesn’t like it, he can come try and shut him up. It’s time for Cody to stand up and meet the man, and they came here for a specific reason, and it wasn’t personal, but it has become personal. He had his chance to meet them straight on, and they will get his attention.
This is followed by a Lance Archer video package that paints him as some kind of psycho backyarder, destroying challenger after challenger until no one is left standing
Announced for next week: Luchasaurus vs Wardlow in a Lumberjack Match, a Parking Lot Brawl between Best Friends & Lucha Bros & The Blood & Guts Match
THE INNER CIRCLE W/SAMMY GUEVARA VS THE ELITE W/KENNY OMEGA & ARN ANDERSON:
Page with a Bridging Wrist-Clutch Suplex on Santana for a 2 count, Ortiz with a Stalling Suplex on Cody for a 2 count, Ortiz with a Small Package for a 2 count, Cody ducks a Lariat and hits Cross Rhodes, but can’t get a cover, Hager Bomb, but Cody gets the knees up, Page with a Fallaway Slam on Santana, Sliding Lariat, but Ortiz makes the save, Cody with a Tope Suicida on Ortiz, he takes Ortiz into the crowd, Wardlow with a goozle, but Arn hims him with the clip board, Matt with Locomotion Northern Lights on Hager, but he blocks the third, Page in for an assist, Double Suplex, Matt calls for The Indytaker, but Hager takes Page off the apron & Santana rolls up Matt in a Victory Roll for the win & to get the man advantage in Blood & Guts (like any good War Games match the heels always have the man advantage)
WINNERS: THE INNER CIRCLE
Jericho gets on the mic and bans fans from all future AEW events until he says otherwise.
And after what they did to Nick Jackson, the Inner Circle outnumber the Elite, so (they all flip the Elite the bird) they don’t stand a chance at Blood and Guts. Hager does pushups and Chris tells Guevara to get on his back so he can do another one.
He takes a minute to ask Sammy to talk about how sexy he is.
Vanguard-1 comes flying in the arena and Matt Jackson gets on the mic.
He says there was one thing wrong with Jericho’s speech, because the Elite isn’t outnumbered. It’s not just the four of them, because he made a phone call to a friend who owed him a favor… we start to hear the familiar sound of Reby playing the piano & BROKEN MATT HARDY IS HERE!
He’s wearing the robe and gurning… DELETE FINGERS! HIS BROKEN BRILLIANCE HAS RETURNED! HE’LL BE THE SUBSTITUTE FOR NICK IN BLOOD & GUTS